The Zenith of distraction and the apex of stupidity

zenith and apex

Knocked up this sign recently. May start pasting it to signposts, posting it through open car windows or attaching it to a sandwich board. As long as I can cycle with a sandwich board that is. Could be tricky, but always willing to develop new skills.

Judging by the amount of people I’ve seen holding their shoulder stiffly whilst gazing down towards their navel and driving at 30mph(+ in some cases), I can only assume that this behaviour is on the increase. Or there’s something seriously interesting/messy/worrying on their car seat. Or…. they’re driving with some periscope arrangement. I suspect I was right in the first instance. Not even Jurgen Prochnow would try and drive a car with a periscope.

jurgen prochnow

Jurgen Prochnow debates the merits of driving with a periscope

Its stupid behaviour of the highest order. If your phone pings, ignore it. Pull over if you must, tell them what time you’re back for tea/going to the gym/will be appearing at the pub, then use your indicators (flashy things on the side of the car, looks like a Dalek’s ears) to ease back into traffic, safe in the knowledge that you did the legal, safe and sensible thing.

Dalek 2

Dalek’s indicate which direction they intend to turn by blinking the appropriate light.

If you’re wondering what’s set me off, it might just be the car that shot out of a side street yesterday, driver arguing on the phone (lots of hand waving), no seat belt, tackling corner at speed, turning wheel with the wrong hand, all whilst the baby in the back looked on. Then there was the driver yesterday lunchtime, texting whilst racing toward the junction on Windsor road and sailing through a light that was turning from amber to red. On the way back, a driver pulling onto Lewis Road whilst merrily reading a smartphone (An iphone. Yes, I was that close). No need to cite more examples of course. It isn’t rare any more.

That’s two testy posts on the bounce. I’m not sure if this one complies with my resolution to Campaign and lobby for our two wheeled lot with a smile and a “isn’t our way just that little bit better?” demeanour’  but boy does it feel good.


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